It’s a drag…

I’m being a bad boy again. I’m cancelling my 8:00 class for Tuesday morning. I only have one more teaching day left and there’s nothing left for me to cover that only takes one class period. I’ve thought about trying to condense a two day lecture into one day but I’m not sure it’s worth it. And I’ve tried to think of something else to cover that wasn’t on the syllabus and that’s not coming to me either. Tomorrow (Tuesday) is my last day of teaching for my 8:00 class. On Thursday, I’m out of town and I have someone else covering the class, and next Tuesday the costume designer is guest teaching, and a week Thursday I’m giving my final exam. So there you have it. I don’t think any of my students will mind not having to get up in the morning and I know I won’t mind.

Tonight I was invited to dinner at the faculty choreographer’s house. I’ve known her for 10 years and it’s actually her fault that I’ve spent my winter and spring in Iowa. It was quite nice. We had pasta, chicken and vegetables and sat around and dished about the school. She apologized over and over again for bringing me here in the first place. I’ve assured her it was a nice experience and that I’m glad I’d done it. It’s easier to say that now that the light has appeared at the end of the tunnel. The evening ended with us taking a walk in the balmy 80 degree evening.

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it but I’m going to Portland, Maine this weekend. My friend Michelle is performing in a drag show. If you were reading my blog last summer I posted pictures of the first performance she and her friends put on. It was a lot of fun, with muchos, muchos drunk lesbians in the backyard and garage of one of Michelle’s friends. The show was hysterical and was a huge hit. They performed again last October to a sold out show. So they’ve gotten the group back together and are performing once again. I’ll be sure to post pictures when I return. More than anything, it’ll be nice to be out of BFE, Iowa and in the large city of Portland

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That’s the way we all became the Brady Bunch

It’s been a very bizarre day. I slept late this morning. I didn’t even begin to wake up until almost 12:30 which was fine with me. I’d known all week that Saturday was my day to sleep late. What was weird was that I got up checked my email (I had an email from my evil student Jack) checked my voice mail (my landlord wanted to show my house today) and then returned a couple of calls. My friend Todd called from San Diego and had left a message (the ringer was off on my phone) and my roommate Chuck had called last night but not left a message. I talked to both of them. Todd was just leaving a Walk-A-Thon in San Diego and Chuck was getting his hair cut. I talked to both of them for about 2 minutes. I was in bed during these conversations and when I finished the second call I hung up rolled over and went back to sleep.

brady_bunch_onstairs_s.jpgThis wouldn’t be so interesting except that I dreamed that I was redecorating the Brady House. The whole family was there and Mrs. Brady was unhappy with some of the construction and was being difficult. At which point, a designer friend of mine showed up to offer his help. Except he designs lights not houses so it wasn’t much good. Part of the construction was the installation of a huge pool and pool house and an enclosed glass patio on the back of the house. It felt like nothing was going right and the situation kept getting worse and worse. Finally I woke up and was exhausted. It was 4:30. Where had the day gone.

Tonight I went to see the dance show again. As a designer I don’t have to be in attendance after the show opens. In fact most often I’m off to my next project the day after opening. But I enjoy this show. It’s interesting and fun and moves me each time. It also help that the Snow White part of the show has a different ending each night that the audience votes on. Tonight was ending two. It’s my favorite. Of course the fact that I voted four times might have helped out the situation.

After the show the faculty choreographer and her husband and their friend from the music department went out for a beer. It was a little whole in the wall place filled with smoke and bright fluorescent lighting. It was nice doing something social. We mostly bitched about the school. The music guy was only hired on a two year basis and this is the end of his second year so he was very open in his opinion about the school. In fact, we live near each other and at the end of the evening we stood on the corner and talked for about 30 minutes. We both agreed the students at our school leave something to be desired. The students at state schools are more dedicated and talented even though they didn’t get 1600’s on their SAT’s. I wish I had met this guy 3 months ago. It would have been nice to have someone to hang out with.

Tomorrow it’s supposed to be 80 here. I think I’m going to set my alarm and get up early and go for a walk. The last performance of my show is at 8:00 and I think I’ll go by and see that and maybe end the day with a movie. I have a student directed show that I’m helping with on Monday so I need to do some prep work for that and then get ready for the week. Did I mention that I’m going to Maine next weekend. Yippeeeee. I can hardly wait.

Only 18 more days in the Land of Giants…

Snow White and the bad mood…

calvin-bad-mood.gifI’m in a bad mood tonight.  I don’t know why.  It’s not like anything happened, or someone said something, or anything else for that matter.  It just is.  And that’s all.  And how is this mood manifesting itself.  Well I just sent off a rather terse email about a student at school.  He’s been a pain in the ass since day one, although I don’t have him in my class.  Today though, I got an email from his professor wanting to know why the information (let’s call him Jack) needs for a project hasn’t been sent to him yet.  It could be because Jack hasn’t asked for it.  It also could be that before I send him the information I think I should discuss it with him.  But I think Jack would rather have his arm cut off than actually have a conversation with me.  He actually won’t speak to me, unless I speak to him first, which I find bothersome.  But what annoys me the most is that the rest of the faculty allows him to behave this way.  The tolerate it and write if off as “he’s just that way.”  If someone would sit him down and explain to him that he doesn’t get to treat people this way, and if he does there are consequences I think it would stop.  But I have to remember that I’m only here for 19 more days and who am I to try and change things.

A couple of people have requested to know what the title of the show is that I am doing.  It’s actually a dance show with three pieces in it.  The first piece is choreographed by a student and designed by a student.  The second piece is choreographed by the dance faculty and designed by me.  The third piece is choreographed by a guest choreographer and designed by me.  The show is quite good and I don’t always like dance.  The works are thought provoking and meaningful.  The dance by the faculty choreographer is about grief and is very moving.  During rehearsals there were a night I was almost brought to tears by the significance of the dance.  It was the night of the Virginia Tech shooting and on the same day a student on my campus was discovered dead.  So the amount of sorrow and grief in the room was much greater than normal and the dance held much more importance.

images-35.jpgThe third piece I designed is a dance that retells the story of Snow White.  The story is told through text and movement and uses bits of the story from the Grimm’s fairytale as well as moments from the Disney version.  It’s rather dark and ominous.   The show is amazing and the choreographer was wonderful to work with.  She allowed me to think outside the box and I was able to embrace the space as an environment for the show.  I lit the architecture of the theatre, including the ceiling, the I-beams, the walls and the supports.  By embracing these elements we were able to find a voice for the rest of the piece and the rest of the design flowed out of that.   A guy from school took pictures on Wednesday night.  If any of them are any good  I’ll post them next week.

Another Openin’, Another Show

The show I’ve been working on opened tonight to rave reviews.  In fact, based on the comments I was receiving you would have thought I was someone famous.  The accolades were many.  I was told more than once that I would have to come back and design for them again.  At one point the tech director turned to the chair and told her there was no way I was leaving without signing a contract to do more shows.  The costume designer basically said that I was too good to waste my time in Iowa.  All of this a mere three days after they let me know in an email they weren’t hiring me.  Hmmm.  How do you think they would have responded if I’d actually gotten the job.

I do have to admit, all of this praise feels good, but it doesn’t negate the fact that I’m good enough to design for them just not good enough to teach their students.  I’m not sure how I feel about that.  The situation is made even more interesting because I managed to get approval for a student to design one of the pieces tonight and it’s the first time in years that a student has designed mainstage.  The chair of the department turned to me at intermission with nothing but praise about the students work, not realizing that it was a student’s design.  When I told her, she brushed it off as if I must have done all the work, which is far from the truth.  The way I see it, I did my job and taught a student enough about lighting, to design her own show.   Maybe I’m not such a bad teacher after all.

I’m also worried that my friend Stefan didn’t find my post yesterday funny.  If you didn’t…I’m sorry.  Please call me so that I can apologize in person and know that you have been mentioned in my blog for the very last time.

Have a great Friday.

Only 20 more days till I hit the road, Jack.

A rose by any other name…

So I slept in this morning and skipped my faculty meeting. Not a single person mentioned my not being there. I think they knew that since I’m not going to be working here next year, and since it was 8:00 a.m. in the morning, and since I can’t really vote nor have an opinion on anything there wasn’t much need to be there. I do however, get the feeling someone mentioned how I was notified I wasn’t getting the job. I’ve talked to a number of people who are in the business world and they have all been amazed that I was told in an email. All of them, and these are high level executives who hire and fire everyday, agree that the chair should have picked up the phone and told me in person. Instead, it was a very impersonal email, that had the all the personality of a rock. It was as if she had never met me, let alone had an office across the hall from me for three months.

careergirl.gifThe reason I think someone said something today at the faculty meeting was because late this afternoon I received an email from her asking if we could talk about it. I think if she had wanted to talk about it, she would have mentioned it in the first email. In truth I have no desire to meet and talk. There’s nothing she’s going to say that’s not going to piss me off. There are so many things wrong with the system here. There have been people forced out of their jobs, students who are allowed to dictate to faculty how they should be treated, and one woman who single handily makes everyone she comes in contact with miserable and she’s been in the department for 20 plus years. I’ve know since day one, that I was not a good fit for the school. The only reason I interviewed for the job was because I was asked to. And the only reason I wanted it, is because as of right now nothing else has come along yet. And the way I see it, it’s better to have a job you don’t like than no job at all. I’ll let you know if we finally talk.

On a different note. There are two people in my life who know about my blog. My friend Todd and my friend Scott (not his real name). A couple of weeks ago I mentioned Scott in a post. Today he told me that he didn’t want to me to mention him in my blog again. He wanted his personal life to be just that. Personal. I didn’t think anything about it when I mentioned him in my blog. I assumed since no one knows who I am then know one knows who he is. I said this to him today. But he was adamant that I not discuss him. So although I don’t really agree with him, I do see his side of the argument. And besides I care too much about him to do anything to alienate him, hurt his feelings or make him mad at me. Especially on purpose. So I told him tonight that I would only talk about him when I have to or if it’s not personal and that I would no longer refer to him by his real name but use the pretend name Scott, or Doug, or Chad, or Jason, or James, or Ed, or Victor, or Mike, or Kevin, or Steven, or Tom, or Erik, or David, or Jesse, or Brad, or Kevin, or Tony, or Ashton, or Trevor, or Daniel, or Lee, or Pierre, or Louis, or John, or Tim, or Keith, or Richard, or Matt, or Sean, or Kelly, or Jay, or Pete, or…well I’m running out of names. But you get the point. its_a_boy.jpg

A Day In The Life…

images-32.jpgThe IRS was reading my blog again today.  It’s beginning to make me nervous.  They read from somewhere in the DC area, and they don’t ever leave a comment.  The last thing I need is to be audited.  Not that I have anything to hide.  I’m sure my taxes from the last ten years or so are in perfect order.  Well sort of.  At least I hope so anyway.

Not much to report here today.  I cancelled my 8:00 class on Tuesday.  I didn’t get home from work last night till close to 1:00 a.m. Monday night and  I  hadn’t had time to plan, so although I knew what I was teaching I hadn’t organized my notes or really thought about how to approach the class.  When I ran into my students later, they seemed to be very grateful for the day off.  I was nice enough to email them Monday night,  so most of them knew they could stay in bed.

images-33.jpgThe show I’m designing at school is going quite well.  It’s a dance show and I think it’s some of my best dance work ever.  One of the pieces is very cutting edge and pushes the boundaries of what we know about dance.  The guest choreographer is well known in her field and she’s been great to work with.  In fact, yesterday she pulled me aside and asked me if I’d like to come live with her in Atlanta and design all of her shows.  It was quite a compliment.  I of course said yes.  Hopefully, I’ll get photos of the show in the next couple of days and be able to show you what I’ve been up to.

I’m also skipping the 8:00 faculty meeting tomorrow.  I’m not sure why I need to be there.  I usually just sit there and drink Diet Coke and doodle on my legal pad.  I rarely if ever, say anything, and because I’m not on the faculty I don’t get a vote on anything.  So tomorrow’s meeting has to be held at 8:00 a.m. because the chair has a meeting at noon she has to attend, so I’ve decided to skip it.  I’ll sleep in and go in later for notes.  I mean, really, what are they going to do fire me???

images-34.jpgSpring is finally here.  It’s rained all day.  It’s one of those cold driving spring rains.  The temperature was in the 50’s today, but when I was soaking wet walking home it felt more like 30 degrees.  It’s supposed to rain all day tomorrow as well, which will make walking to work a lot of fun.  Of course if I owned an umbrella it might not be so bad.

Happy Hump Day.

Nightmare in Iowa!

Should I be worried that someone from the IRS in Washington D.C. was reading my blog today.  I promise I’ll get my taxes in before the extension runs out, and I know that I don’t owe you any money.  Please, please, please don’t audit me.

Perhaps that will work.

It’s been an interesting day.

I’ve mentioned before that I take medication for depression.  One of the side effects of the medication is that it sometimes makes me have very wild, very vivid dreams.  It happens much less now than when I first started taking it, but every once in a while I get one that sets me on edge.  Last night I had one of those dreams.  Often when I have these dreams I come in and out of sleep, aware that I am dreaming but unable to stop it.  Today the dreams continued through the snoozing of my alarm.

So what was the dream about.  I dreamed that my Aunt Debbie and her four kids (who are grown now but were children in the dream) murdered my mother and father just for the hell of it.  They had been told my parents were leaving them a fortune and they wanted to collect it.  To make matters worse they weren’t very concerned about it until I walked in and discovered the bodies.  At this point they realized they would have to kill me as well.  So not only was I distraught over the death of my parents I was now running for my life as they chased me.  At some point I acquired a small child that I was protecting that they were also trying to kill.  I don’t remember everything about it but I do remember trying to get in a car to get away from them.  This continued for what seemed like hours.  I was finally pulled completely out of my sleep by the phone ringing.  (I’ll come back to the phone call.)  I was exhausted beyond belief, and stressed out, and took a while to realize that it was all a dream and that none of it had happened.  In fact, I’ve been a little out of sorts all day because of the dream.

Now back to the phone call.  It was my friend from school who got me the job here in Iowa in the first place.  She was calling to see if I had read the email from the chair of the department about the full time position.  I had not, I was still asleep, but I didn’t tell her that.  She was upset, because the email basically told me that I did NOT get the job, and the chair had decided to share the news with me in an impersonal email rather than talking to me in person.  In truth, I think my friend was more upset by it than I was.  We talked a few minutes, as I assured her it was no big deal (although, I was still very much out of sorts because of the dream) and then hung up.

I’m not really upset by the news.  I’ve known for a while that I wasn’t getting the job.  Without sharing too much information, one leg of the interview didn’t go well.  I knew it didn’t go well, and when I realized why it wasn’t going well, I knew that I’d never really want to work here.  It also doesn’t help that in the past three months I’ve become very aware of the political climate of the department and the situation in Iraq is less volatile than this department.  They have all been on their best behavior since I’ve been here, but people talk and it’s sounds just awful.  I do have to admit that it would have been nice if the chair had had the nerve to pick up the phone and call me to talk about the position.  Is she really afraid that I’m going to yell at her, or cry.  I’m not that unbalanced.

So that’s my day.  It’s 12:45 and I just got home from work.  I’m tired, hungry and grumpy.  I’m going to eat dinner and go to bed.  See you guys tomorrow.



I’ve had writer’s block for the past couple of days. I have no idea what to write about, complain about, brag about, think about. I’m tired of bitching about the weather. It’s warm here finally. What else is there to say. I still don’t know about the full time job in Iowa. I interviewed over two months ago. Not a word since. As always I want the job/don’t want the job. It’s a double edged sword. No matter what the outcome I’d like it to be my decision. Classes are going fine. Nothing to complain about. I have six more teaching days. Yippee. I’m going to Maine the first weekend in May. My friend Michelle is performing in a drag king show. If any of you were reading last summer I posted pictures of their first show. I’ll post more when I return. I was awakened yesterday morning at 7:00 a.m. by men cutting down the tree in my front yard. It was not my idea of fun. I dreamed of the movie “Life With Father” last night. How fucked up is that. I also dreamed my brother was directing the play “Beautiful Thing” and didn’t hire me to design it. My roommate Chuck has a date on Tuesday with Richard. Keep your fingers crossed Richard disappoints Chuck and actually shows up. My friend Todd wants me to move to North Carolina and live on the beach with him. I suggested Chuck should come too. It would be fun, but what would I do for a living. My Aunt Doo’s birthday was on Friday. I sent her flowers. I scolded a student today for showing up to rehearsal unprepared. She looked as if I was going to hit her. For the past several days the coffee I’ve had in the morning has made me nauseous. Any idea what that’s about. I started watching the first season of the Sopranos this weekend. It’s great. I’ve never really watched it before. I also watched the movie Hollywoodland. It bored me and didn’t hold my attention. We almost got a thunderstorm here tonight, but it didn’t happen. It would have been my first real thunderstorm in three years. My friend Todd is supposed to come and visit me here in Iowa the second weekend in May. It’ll take about three minutes to show him around. Who knows what we’ll do after that. He’s at the Watering Hole I talk so much about tonight. There are only 26 days till I leave Iowa and head to New York. Perhaps I should see a show while I am visiting. I did laundry tonight. I didn’t do my dishes. I need to do my dishes. The receipts for my taxes are lying in the middle of my living room floor. I still need to organize them. I have become very fond of grilled burritos from Taco John’s. What a great name for a Mexican restaurant. My friend Todd mailed me a birthday present today. He’s a little late don’t you think. My friend Mike goes to court tomorrow for a little incident he was involved in back last fall. Let’s all hope it goes well. My friend Sean just got back from Mexico. Am I boring you? I don’t have to be at work until three tomorrow. I’m going to sleep in. I should go to bed now. Good night.

Maddog’s Me Meme…

I found this meme a while ago and filled it out. It’s a bit long but kind of interesting.

What is your name?: Maddog
Are you named after anyone?: Not that I’m aware of
What’s your screen name?: Maddog
Would you name a child of yours after you?: Probably not, although I do have a cousin named after me.
If you were born a member of the opposite sex what would your name be?: I’m not sure, maybe Ruby.
If you could switch names with a friend who would it be?: As long as I could keep my last name I’d like it to be Doug or David. I always wanted a name that started with “D”
Are there any mispronunciations/typos that ppl do w/ your name constantly?: My last name is always butchered, and the same mistakes are almost always the same since most people don’t believe the name is real.
Would you drop your last name if you became famous?: Never


Your gender: Male
Straight/Gay/Bi: Gay
Single: Very
Do you want to be?: Nope although there are no prospects on the horizon
Birthdate: 1965
Your age: 42

Age you act: About 25
Age you wish you were: I’d love to be 25 and know everything I know now.
Your height: 6’0″
Eye color: Very blue
Happy with it?: It’s one of my favorite things about myself.
Hair color: Dark brown with beginning traces of grey when I let it grow long enough to see it.
Happy with it?: When I was a kid I wanted blond hair, but I like my hair just fine now.
Lefty/righty/ambidextrous: Right handed
Your living arrangement: Two dwellings. A two bedroom aparment in NYC and a three bedroom house in Iowa that is great for what it is.
Your family: I don’t understand this question
pets?: Nope
Whats your job?: college professor at the moment
Piercings?: Not anymore
Tattoos?: Nope
Obsessions?: only ice cream at the moment…and maybe sex. But not at the same time.
Addictions?: Diet Coke
Do you speak another language?: I barely speak English.
Have a favourite quotation?: Not really.
Do you have a web page?: Yes and a blog
Do you live in the moment?: Not very often.
Do you consider yourself tolerant of others?: Most of the time.
Do you have any secrets?: Many
Do you hate yourself?: Sometimes.
Do you like your handwriting?: I like my printing. I don’t like my writing.
Do you have any bad habits?: Too many to mention.
What is the compliment you get from most people?: You have nice eyes.
If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?: I’ll let you guys decide.
What’s your biggest fear?: Failure. It’s sometimes debilitating.
Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?: Not in a long time.
Are you a loner?: Not by choice, but I seem to find myself in that position a lot.
What is your #1 priority in life?: Getting a job.

If you were another person, would you be friends with you?: I’d like to think so. I’m funny and silly, and very devoted. Often I do the work to stay in touch with people from my past.
Are you a daredevil?: Not with physical activities. But I’ve been known to take chances I shouldn’t.
Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?: My weight more than anything.
Are you passive or aggressive?: Yes, I am both, depending on the activity.
Do you have a journal?: I haven’t journaled since my old roommate in NYC found one and read it. Then confided he had done it. My blog is the closest I get to journaling.
What is your greatest strength and weakness?: I procrasinate. I am very dedicated to a project once I agree to do it.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?: My weight, which is directly related to my eating habits.
Do you think you are emotionally strong?: Depends. When I have to be I am.

Is there anything you regret doing/not doing in life?: I regret not finishing grad school earlier and not forcing my mom to talk about my real father years ago. I regret letting “Sam” get away from me.

Do you think life has been good so far?: For the most part, my life has been great.
What is the most important lesson you’ve learned from life?: You get back what you put out. Karma is a very strong thing.
What do you like the most about your body?: My eyes.
And least?: My weight.
Do you think you are good looking?: When I’m skinny I think I’m very attractive.
Are you confident?: Sometimes, much more so when I’m thinner than right now.
What is the fictional character you are most like?: I have no idea.
Are you perceived wrongly?: I’m told sometimes that I am intimidating and I’ve never seen it…but a lot of people say it’s true…so there must be something to it.

Do You…

Smoke?: Never.
Do drugs?: Not in a long time.
Read the newspaper?: Nope, they just collect in a pile on the floor.
Pray?: Not as much as I should.
Go to church?: Not in a long time.
Talk to strangers who IM you?: I haven’t been IM’d by a stranger in forever.
Sleep with stuffed animals?: Nope, but I have a large collection to Teddy Bears my mother has given me over the years.
Take walks in the rain?: Not in a long time.
Talk to people even though you hate them?: When I have to.
Drive?: I’ve never minded driving. In fact I’m about to drive from Iowa to NYC.
Like to drive fast?: Not nearly as much as I did when I was younger.

Would or Have You Ever

Liked your voice?: Yes
Hurt yourself?: That’s a story in and of itself.
Been out of the country?: Yes, several times.
Eaten something that made other people sick?: I’m sure I have.
Been in love?: Yes.
Done drugs?: Yes.
Gone skinny dipping?: Yes. In the Pacific Ocean and the Kentucky River.
Had a medical emergency?: My appendix.
Had surgery?: Yes. My appendix burst in December of 2003 and I had emergency surgery and spent 8 days in the hospital.
Ran away from home?: Yes. Another long story.
Played strip poker?: Not that I remember.
Gotten beaten up?: Not since elementary school.
Beaten someone up?: not that I remember.
Been picked on?: Yes
Been on stage?: Yes
Slept outdoors?: Yes
Thought about suicide?: Another very long story.

Pulled an all nighter?: Too many to count. The last one within the last year.
If yes, what is your record?: Way toooooo many to count.
Gone one day without food?: Not on purpose.
Talked on the phone all night?: Yes
Slept together with the opposite sex w/o actually having sex?: Yes.
Slept all day?: Yes
Killed someone?: No
Made out with a stranger?: Yes
Had sex with a stranger?: Yes
Thought you’re going crazy?: Yes.
Been betrayed?: Yes
Had a dream that came true?: Yes.
Broken the law?: Yes
Met a famous person?: Bob Hope in 1983 on a high school trip to New York. He was wearing orange sneakers.
Have you ever killed an animal by accident?: Yes
On purpose?: Do you count fishing?
Told a secret you swore you wouldn’t tell?: Unfortunately yes…
Stolen anything?: Another long story…did I mention Karma earlier.
Been on radio/tv?: Yes, both.
Been in a mosh-pit?: Nope.
Had a nervous breakdown?: Yes.
Bungee jumped?: Twice.
Had a dream that kept coming back?: Nope.


Believe in life on other planets?: Human life…not necesarily. In other forms of life…why not.
Miracles?: Yes.
Astrology?: Yes.
Magic?: Not really
God?: A higher power yes. A Christian God…I’m not always sure.
Satan?: No.
Santa?: No.
Ghosts?: Yes.
Luck?: Yes.
Love at first sight?: Yes.
Yin and yang (that good cant exist w/o bad)?: Unfortunately, I think that’s the case.
Witches?: Why not. There are people who call themselves witches. Who am I to argue?
Easter bunny?: Hmmmm.
Believe its possible to remain faithful forever?: Yes, although very difficult.
Believe theres a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow?: There’s something at the end of the rainbow.
Do you wish on stars?: Sometimes.

Deep Theological Questions

Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?: Depends on the day.
Do you think God has a gender?: I always picture God as a man but that’s because as a youngster in Sunday school God is referred to as “him” and “he”.
Do you believe in organized religion?: I believe organized religion exists. Do I want to be a part of it. Never. There’s too much hate preached by most “churches.”
Where do you think we go when we die?: I have no idea. On somedays heaven. On others….you just die.


Do you have any gay/lesbian friends?: Yes.
Who is your best friend?: Michelle and Todd.
Who’s the one person that knows most about you?: Michelle and Todd.
What’s the best advice that anyone has ever given to you?: To go back to grad school.
Your favourite inside joke?: Do you want to act up, act in or act out?
Thing you’re picked on most about?: Depends on whose doing the picking.

Love and All That

Do you consider love a mistake?: I have fallen for the wrong people a couple of times but don’t know if it was a mistake.
What do you find romantic?: Long walks holding hands. Candle lit dinners. Snuggling on the sofa.
Turn-on?: Sense of Humor.
Turn-off?: Racism…another long story.

First kiss?: My first kiss with a guy was my senior year of high school at a speech tournament. The guy was in college and I didn’t even know his name. I did know that I liked it and wanted to do it some more.
If someone you had no interest in had interest in dating you how would you feel?: Uncomfortable. It’s happened a couple of times and it never ends well.
Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going out?: Not always.
Have you ever wished it was more socially acceptable for a girl to ask a guy out?: That doesn’t affect me in the slightest.
Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive?: Hmmm. Not that I remember.
What is best about the opposite sex?: Hmmmm.
What is the worst thing about the opposite sex?: Hmmmmm.
What is best about your sex? Hmmm…….
What is the worst thing about your sex? Inability to remain faithful.
What’s the last present someone gave you?: My friend Curtis gave me a gift certificate to I-Tunes for my birthday.

Are you in love?: Not romantically.
Do you consider your ’significant other’ (or whatever) hot?: I wish I had a hot significant other.

Right This Moment…
Are you going out?: Not tonight. It’s almost 1:30 a.m.
Will it be with your significant other?: Nope.
Or some random person?: Neither.
What are you wearing right now?: Boxer and a long sleeve t-shirt.
Body part you’re touching right now?: I’m not…although I may have just scratched my balls.
What are you worried about right now?: Finding a full time job.
What book are you reading?: I just finished In Cold Blood by Truman Capote

What’s on your mouse pad?: It’s an Office Depot mouse pad
Use 5 words to describe how you’re feeling?: Bored, Scared, Depressed, Horny, and Lonely.
Are you bored?: Very
Are you tired?: Yes

Are you talking to anyone online?: No.
Are you talking to anyone on the phone?: No.
Are you lonely or content at the moment?: Lonely
Are you listening to music?: No, it’s quiet.

The Sun Will Be Up Soon…

It’s 2:30 a.m. and I just got home from school. It’s been a very long day. I got there at 8:00 a.m. this morning, so if you do the math it’s been an 18 hour day. I hope somebody over there appreciates the dedication and hard work. I don’t think they do, but I can hope anyway.

Not much to report here today. The weather seems to finally be nice. It was in the mid 60’s all day today and according to the reports it’s only supposed to get better from here. I noticed today that the grocery store near me, now has a tent like structure with lots of flowers for sale. If I didn’t know better I’d swear that spring finally is here.


Classes are going great. I have six more classes to teach plus finals. Unfortunately in one class I’m behind so I have to get my ass in gear and get caught up. In the other class we are right on schedule but my students are really going to have work hard if they are going to get their final projects done by finals week.

My last class is May 17th. It’s a three hour final that will be spent critiquing projects. Then I rush home pack my boxes, get my house ready to close up and on May 19th I leave for NYC. This is of course assuming that I don’t get the job here. If by some chance they decide to give me the full time position then, suddenly some of my plans change and I won’t get to New York until the middle of the next week. This is all speculation though so we’ll have to see.

That’s it for today. Happy Friday.

Days till my resurrection: 29