About Me

I’m a 43 year old gay man living in New York City. I’m a lighting designer by day and a waiter by night. Or maybe it’s a waiter by day and a lighting designer by night. I guess it depends on what day you ask me. I started this blog to document my move to NYC and it’s two years later and I’m still in NYC and I’m still blogging so I guess that means things are going well. The blog is a mixture of my daily excursions, rants on waiting, dealing with incompetence, designing, boys, drinking, travels, drag kings, and sex. So step inside I’m sure I’ll do something to offend you.

It’s now three years later and boy have things changed for the better.  I’m still a waiter in a high volume restaurant in New York.  I hate it much more than I used to but it’s how I pay my rent so what’s a girl to do.  I’m a trained lighting designer and am actually quite good at what I do.  I’m often to intimidated to put myself out there and it doesn’t help that I’m twice as old as my peers.  This is all stuff that’s in my head but once again what’s a girl to do.  The good news in my life is that I met a boy at the beginning of the year (2009).  His name is Adam and he’s the best boyfriend that I’ve ever had.  Sometimes I wonder what he sees in me but there is no accounting for taste.  So as this blog thing continues I’ll continue my stories about New York and work, but I’ll also give you a glimpse into my relationship with Adam.  He knows about the blog so I can’t be too revealing.


I’m now a 50 year old gay man living in Maine.  I’m the general manager of a hotel/restaurant in a small tourist town near Portland.  I’ve been with my partner Adam for 6 years.  I have two cats named Violet and Judy and I live a very boring, mundane perfect life that thrills me beyond belief.  I’ve never been happier in my life and am quite content for the first time in my 50 years.


We are just about to buy our first house.  We close this week.  Oh.  My.  God.  What the fuck are we doing!!!


7 thoughts on “About Me

  1. debbie June 20, 2007 / 12:37

    Only because you had no responses, I had to leave one. I happened upon this story by accident, looking for the dental insurance plan of the iatse national, and here I am reading your story. I like the freedom you express, from what I was reading, and the fact that someone else uses the phrase “sucky ass”. You seem to be a very musical person, and can dance your way through just about anything, in the stronger sense of the word, “dance”. Oh well Oh. Beauty from the eyes of a stranger.

  2. Donna July 3, 2007 / 21:29

    I too happened on your blog by accident, I had put in the search for Iowa and somewhere in the mix was your blog! I was very curious as to how you would find Iowa. I enjoy your view of the world and will continue reading even if you have left Iowa.

    Donna a good hearted old lady(ghol)

  3. Raoul Butler July 6, 2007 / 12:03

    In the sat and mcat back in university days, I aced all those silly queens. Turned forty-one and still open in my “bama” hometown. NYC welcomed me with open-arms and Jeremy Piven walked up to me- thought (do not say a word… just ask him what time is it)

  4. sweetiegirlz January 24, 2008 / 03:21

    Any job with a public service will ALWAYS make for great blogging. I was a night shift cashier in a pharmacy/liquor store, and believe me the Truth will always be stranger than any fiction.

  5. James Malone May 6, 2008 / 06:02

    hey there….I just moved back to OKC from Chicago. When you get here, if you’d like to do dinner, shoot me an email. I love your blog and your writing style. 🙂

    Have a good one!

  6. Daniel May 17, 2008 / 19:46

    Hey Maddog, I’ve got the money shots of Jeffry West. i can send them to you as an attachment if you like. Let me know.

  7. madhouse6 November 6, 2008 / 11:55

    cool. i so have a thing for lighting designers – so flipping beautiful what you guys do… i produce hair shows in my real life so i’m around a fair bit of lighting techs. always blown away by what they do.

    very cool blog.

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