My deep dark secrets.

So I’m doing much better on my New Year’s resolutions.  I now have 10 days of dieting under my belt.  The same for blogging.  And almost the same for reading.  I’m off to a good start…again.

It’s much harder to come up with things to write about than it used to be.  Mostly because I’m more guarded than I used to be.  When I started my blog I wrote about VERY personal stuff.  My 9th post was about giving a boy a blow job in a booth at an adult bookstore and his getting mad at me because I put my hand on the back of his head.  I don’t write about stuff that personal anymore.  Adam reads my blog.  Chuck reads my blog.  Todd reads my blog.  The lesbians all know about my blog.  It’s hard to feel free to write about stuff that super personal to me.  Adam has told me to just go for it.  But somehow I can’t let go and just do it.  So I write about mundane stuff like our house, and my job, and my New Year’s resolutions.

I’m not even sure what I would write about if I was just going to throw all caution to the wind and just write.  There are a few things I might comment on, or confess to, or admit to.  But even beyond the people I know personally who read my blog, I worry about the people I’ve never met who read my blog and what they’ll think of me.  What if Java, or Dr. Mike, or Mom, or Bonnie, or my friend the librarian discover I’m human and don’t like what they see.  What happens then?

It’s funny because at work I don’t worry about what anyone thinks about me.  I’m often the bad guy as a result.  I say what everyone else in the room is thinking.  But on here.  I worry a lot.

So I’ll leave it at this tonight.  Who knows.  Tomorrow I might confess my deep dark secrets.  Or I might just wine about the additional 24 inches of snow we are supposed to get on Sunday!


3 thoughts on “My deep dark secrets.

  1. usstorageunit February 13, 2015 / 18:20

    As for what you write about…. When I discovered your blog, on Ur-Spo’s blog roll, I went back to the beginning and read the whole thing. I thought it was very interesting. Your comments about bad tippers has permanently changed how I tip (at least 20% always) and I’m very conscious about how much time we are at a table. And here I am, still checking out your blog…. Just write about you! I think it’s fascinating!
    Karen, the librarian
    (Actually, now I’m a reading teacher… Hoping one day to be the librarian again! )

  2. UrspoU February 14, 2015 / 20:14

    I enjoy – and appreciate – anything your write.

  3. javabear February 15, 2015 / 11:49

    I recall a few years ago, pre-Adam days I think, when you wrote about your past relationship with Sam. You had been young and your moral compass (or whatever) was not as honed as it is now. And I said something disparaging about you. Maybe I called you an ass hole or something of that nature. Even now, as then, I like you. I like the man I’ve come to know through what you write in your blog, anyway.

    Also, what Karen said: I have learned a lot about how to be a good customer in a restaurant from your blog posts. For that matter, I’ve learned a thing or two about lighting from you. Disclaimer: the lighting in my home is horrible and I’m not going to do anything about it until all the miscreant children leave home.

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