I hate my fucking life.

It’s 4:00 (4:26 now) a.m.  I should be in bed.

Unfortunately I’m not sleepy.

Unfortunately I have to be back at work in 3.5 (3 now) hours.

Which means that I have to be on my way to the subway in 2.75 (2.25 now) hours.

Which is going to make me one VERY unpleasant guy tomorrow today.

I also got a lesson in telling the truth today.

Tomorrow Today is the yearly all staff meeting.  It’s a chance for the head honchos to tell us what a great job we’ve been doing.  How are numbers are higher than ever.  That life couldn’t be better.  Which is why you have to sell frequent flyer memberships, we’ve raised your insurance premiums by 80 dollars and well, you get the point.

This meeting starts at 8:00.  I’m supposed to be there by 7:30 to clock in and eat breakfast.  Which used to be a full buffet.  Now it’s just a bagel and some juice.  It will last until about 10:30.

Here’s the rub.  I closed tonight.  I didn’t get home until almost 2:45 a.m.

I have to leave for work at 6:45.

If you need to, get your calculators out.  That means I will be home for four hours.  Four hours for dinners, email, blog, shower before bed, shower before I leave, and I’m forgetting something…OH.  YEAH.  Sleep.

I’m too old to go without sleep.  It will fuck with me for the next three days.

So.  Being the upstanding employee that I am, I went to management today and told them I wouldn’t be in.  That I couldn’t close tonight, be at the restaurant at 7:30 the next morning, and close tomorrow night.  I was just too old to do it.

And I was told.

That is was not a valid excuse.

WHAT???

What would be a better excuse because I can come up with something better if you give me two seconds.

Yes.  I was told that it wasn’t a valid excuse and that I would be expected to be there.

And the moral of that story.  I should have just not gone.  There will be many people who just don’t show up today.  They will “over sleep”, or “forget”  or have a “doctor’s appointment”  or something.  Yes.  If I’d just kept my mouth shut I’d be on my way to bed in about fifteen minutes, to sleep for eight hours before going to work tomorrow night.

Now.

I’m going to go nap on the couch.  I don’t want to sleep in bed because, 1.  I’m afraid that I won’t wake up.  2.  I don’t want to wake Adam when my alarm goes off four times.  3.  I might just decide to turn the alarm off and say fuck it and go back to sleep.

So.  I’m going to nap on the couch.  And then I’ll go to my fucking meeting.  And I’ll eat my fucking bagel.  And I’ll listen as they tell me that our restaurant did 50 million in business this year.  And I’ll pretend that I’m interested.

And you know what pissed me off the most.

You know the reasons I was given as to why to be at the meeting:

1.  There are going to be raffles.

2.  And prizes.

3.  Including two jet blue tickets.  (Given as two separate prizes so you’ll have to pay the way for whomever you take with you.)

4.  And metro cards.

5.  And several 50 dollar gift certificates to Dave and Busters.  (The fucking video arcade restaurant.)

6.  And there will be the employee video that promises to be more fun than ever.  (and the thing about this video.  It’s the same five people in the video each year.  And it’s the same five people doing skits that are only funny if you are 22 and still drunk from spending the night at the bar and not in bed.)

So I’m supposed to attend a meeting not because it has value, but because there will be prizes.  and food.  and movies.

Will someone please explain to these people that I’m NOT.  repeat.  NOT.  12.  or.  22.  or.  32.  or.  even 42 for that fucking matter.  I don’t fucking care.  Give the Jet Blue ticket to someone who does care.  Give the Dave and Buster’s gift certificate to one of the five year olds who spent the night texting and then complaining because they only made four dollars.

Let me get some fucking sleep so that I don’t stick a fork in your eye tomorrow night during my shift.

FUCK.

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2 thoughts on “I hate my fucking life.

  1. Lemuel February 15, 2011 / 06:40

    I am so glad that I no longer have to put up with that kind of corporate b.s. anymore. I just need to worry about how the gov’mint is going to screw me out of what I worked (and paid) for the past 40+ years.

  2. Java February 15, 2011 / 07:00

    That truly sucks. I’ve done a couple of all-nighters since being back in college. I don’t do it well. One night of missed sleep throws me off for three days.

    I hope you make scads of money tonight.

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