I got an interesting comment today. It was from a guy named Joel. What he had to say was nice. The reason it’s interesting is that his blog, The Search for Love in Manhattan, was the first blog, that I started reading regularly. His blog is the reason I started my own. In the spring of 2006, right after I finished school in San Diego and was waiting to move to NYC, I found and started reading his blog. I found it so interesting that I started at the beginning and read all of his posts. To my knowledge I don’t ever remember leaving a comment. So it was a very pleasant surprise today when I checked my gmail and found that I had a comment approve from Joel.
Here is my second blog post ever.
Now to more serious questions.
I actually like that I have a forum to ask questions and that sometimes people actually answer them.
I’m invited to a party on Sunday. At Daniel’s apartment. He is the GM of my restaurant. This is the Daniel I’ve written about numerous times when I’ve been having schedule issues. I’ve known him for years and we’ve talked about getting together for dinner many times and it just hasn’t happened. I also know that NO one at work can know about this. I know this because he said so. So it’s awesome that he respects my ability to keep work and friendship separate. And it’s awesome that he has invited me.
HERE’S THE PROBLEM.
It’s a birthday party/wedding party.
The birthday party is for a six year old and an eight year old. Their parents I know from the restaurant. Amy worked with me in 1998 when I worked there the first time. She is married to John who has worked at our restaurant for about 10 years. So I know them both. Sort of. John works on Friday lunches. One shift a week. That’s it. Amy, who I adored when we worked together, I saw for the first time in ten year about a month ago, when they were eating in the restaurant. I don’t know the kids at all.
The wedding party is for Ruby. She has worked in my restaurant off and on for about 10 years. She doesn’t need to work there. She has a six figure income and owns multiple rental properties in Boston. She is pretty much set. She works there so that she can buy herself expensive tchotchkes without feeling guilty. If she wants a new Coach bag. She picks up a couple of shifts. She wants to go to Greece. She works a couple of shifts. She’s been doing this for years. And in her MANY trips to Greece she has met ____________?. I don’t know his name. I don’t know much about him. Other than he is much younger than her, doesn’t have a job and she has spent a small fortune getting him to the states, marrying him, teaching him English and __________________________________. You can fill in the blanks.
All of this is fine and good except:
Daniel pulled me aside a week ago and told me that this party was a birthday/wedding party. (I thought it was just going to be all of us hanging out.) And he tells me that I should bring a
Yes, you heard that correctly. Bring. GIFTS. With an “S.”
Adam was a little put out from the moment I told him this. Why do we have to spend money on people he doesn’t even know, just to go to a party at my boss’ house? I was put out too. I want to go to my boss’ house for the party. BUT. I don’t want to buy gifts for people I don’t know. And people who don’t need them. AND. I had no idea what to get them. So I asked Daniel.
He suggested books for the kids. And champagne for Ruby. Add to that wine for Daniel and we are talking about a very expensive party.
And it’s money I don’t want to spend.
So here’s the question:
Would it be totally awful of me to use the rain in the apartment story to get out of going on Sunday.
No. Honesty is not an option.
Adam doesn’t like the idea of me lying. And it’s not that I want to lie. I just don’t want to spend 50, 75, 100+ dollars for presents for people who really don’t need them. It’s all been made worse by this being THE worst week I’ve ever had waiting tables. I’ve made about 300 dollars less this week than I should have. AND. It’s February 3 and I still haven’t given Adam my half of February’s rent.
I’m proposing texting around lunch time (with a picture) saying that there is an awful leak in our foyer, closet and bathroom and we can’t leave until we know what’s going on. Which will be long after it’s time for the party.
I know it’s not ideal. But really.
Do I spend money on Saturday to go to party on Sunday?
Do I lie?