House Guests.

We are having house guests this weekend.

We love the idea of house guests.

We hate the reality of house guests.

NYC is tricky when it comes to visitors.  We have to ask ourselves questions like:

1.  Are they going to expect us to entertain them?

2.  Do they expect us to go to the theater with them?

3.  Are they independent and able to fend for themselves?

4.  Are they going to freak out about riding the subway?

5.  Are they going to hole up in the apartment and not leave for four days?  (When I lived with Chuck he had a friend who visited who did just that.  The guy didn’t leave our apartment for four days.  It was VERY weird).

6.  Are they expecting us to feed them while they are here?

7.  Are they going to freak out when they discover Harper’s litter box lives in the guest bath?

8.  Are they going to come in late at night and wake us up?

9.  Are they going to get up at the crack of dawn and expect us up as well?

10.  When are they going to arrive?

11.  When are they going to leave?

12.  Are they going to be inconsiderate like my friend A.C. who was a royal pain in the ass while he was here.

13.  Is the visit going to be perfectly wonderful?  Are we going to be glad they came and miss them when they leave?  Are we going to be happy that we opened our house up to them for the weekend?

All questions we must ask ourselves.

We never mind the visits nearly as much as we dread their arrival.

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