Day 1 In The Land of Corn

Well I made it. I’m in the Land of Corn as this man calls it. I’ll be here till the morning of the 26th. That means I have 17 LONG, VERY LONG days in front of me. Actually I’ll be busy for most of them. At least off and on. The actual scope of the projects has yet to be figured out by anyone least of all me. I’ll have my first face to face meeting tomorrow so I’ll be a little bit better equipped to let you know what’s going on then.

So my day. I didn’t get up till noon. I slept more than 10 hours last night. This after staying up all night the night before to get my light plot finished. When the alarm went off I was still fast asleep. In fact, I was in the middle of dream where everyone hated me because I was bitching about something. This was at my undergrad school although everyone who was there was older. There was a bunch of stuff that happened, including my roommate dumping me for someone else because I was complaining about the state of the dorm we were going to be living in. There was much screaming at me, and embarrassing me by everyone involved. And then just as I woke up I found my friend SK and she was finally nice to me. She agreed to be my roommate and we were just headed to the dorm when the alarm went off. It was a very disturbing dream. I think it was forshadowing of things to come.

Once I was up, I had my usual pot of coffee and watched the news. It was a slow new day. The only thing of importance was the Olympic torch thing in San Francisco. But at that time, there wasn’t much to report. After the news and coffee I showered and then I started packing. I usually don’t pack until the day of the trip. I make little piles in my bedroom (or sometimes the living room). Each pile is important and I stick things there so I know I won’t forget them. So all my piles were complete, and it was time to make it fit in the bag. I probably should have used my monster bag since I was going to be gone so long. But it weighs a ton without clothes and I have never taken it to the airport that I didn’t have to unload something to get it under 50 pounds.

So I used my large carry on bag. It all fit…but barely. By the end I was stuffing socks and underwear into shoes and the corners of the bag. It took about 20 minutes just to get it all to fit. Then it was time to pack my computer bag. It’s just as difficult to pack as the regular bag. First in my medications. I always take them with me just in case the airline loses my bags. I can’t miss a dose. Next I actually need my computer and all it’s cables, mouse, mouse pad, etc. Then my phone charger. Then the book I’m reading and the book I’m going to be reading. Then all the paperwork that pertains to the show. A couple of legal pads to take notes on. A couple of diet cokes, because they cost 10 million dollars a piece at the airport. And then I look around and try to figure out what I’m forgetting.

Today I didn’t figure out what I was forgetting till I was half way to the airport. I forgot the cable to my camera. So as of right now I can’t download pictures to my computer. I sent an email to the tech director on the show asking if he knew where I might find one. If he doesn’t have an answer then I’ll order one and have it sent here. I can’t not post pictures of my wonderful adventures.

At 2:45 the car arrived to take me to the airport. Getting to any of the three airports in the metropolitan area can be very tricky. It can take three minutes or it can take 90 minutes or more. So you have to build in time to get there. I always take a car service. It’s much easier having a car show up at an alloted time and you don’t have to worry if there are no cabs. I won’t take public transportation because it takes too long and I don’t want to carry my bags any farther than I have to. The other nice thing about my taking a car is that I charge it to my friend Lou’s account. Then he expenses it to his company. So neither of us really has to pay. Just don’t tell anyone this.

So I get to the airport in exactly17 minutes. I had given myself an hour. I had also allotted two hour at the airport because I was flying American Airlines and the other news story of the day was that AA had canceled 850 flights in the US today. I was a little worried. I had checked online and my flight was scheduled to depart with no delays and had not been canceled but I was also worried that there would be a million people in line and it would take forever to check in. Exactly 36 minutes after I left my home, I was at the airport, checked in and through security. What the fucks that about.

So now I had to waist almost three hours. So I though I would get some lunch. What I quickly discovered was the only real restaurant was outside security. So back out I went. I went to Something Rock restaurant. It was like a knock off of the Hard Rock Cafe. I grabbed a seat in the back and the waitress approached me. I ordered a beer and a chef’s salad. Not so healthy/healthy all at the same time. And so my beer came and I made a couple of phone calls. Then lunch arrived and I ordered another beer. Then the salad was taken away and I had another beer. Why so many beers. I hate to fly. Actually I don’t mind flying. It’s the take off that scares me. So I always have a few drinks or take some Attavan. Sometimes both. It takes the edge off and I usually don’t mind the take off so much.

So I had my three beers and wandered back through security and down to my gate. I still had an hour-fifteen to go. So I made some more phone calls. I talked to my roommate Chuck, and my friend Donna, and my friend Angie. And while I was talking to Angie, I was cruised by a little 20 something frat boy. At first I was surprised but we he beckoned me to follow him. What could I do but follow him. So I told Angie I would call her back and followed him. And he went into the men’s restroom. At this point all I could think of was Larry Craig getting arrested and that really wouldn’t make my day. But I wanted to see what he was up to so I followed. He went to the urinal, and I went to the one next to him. I stood there long enough to see his erect penis smile at him and then went away. It was a very nice penis I might add. When I got back out of the restroom I called Angie back and started walking toward my gate. Just as I got there they called my name to come to the desk. And so I said good-bye to Angie and went to the counter. They shouted at me to go to the plane they were just about to close the gate.

Damn, I’d been on the phone not paying attention and almost missed my flight. It didn’t help that I was a little tipsy and had already changed the time on my watch so I was kind of thinking I still had an hour. Whoops. Luckily, I got on the plane but they’d given my seat away so I was in the back next to the bathroom. This wouldn’t have been so bad but every time the door opened the most foul smell in the world came sweeping out. It smelled like a port-o-potty that hadn’t been cleaned in weeks. It was disgusting. I tried to tune it out. So I put on my I-pod and went to sleep.

And the plane arrived exactly on time. I got my rental car which took all of about three minutes since it’s billed through the school and all they needed was a license to make sure I was who I was supposed to be. So then I was on my way. First stop the movies. I had decided to stop by and just see what was happening. And the answer was not much. I did meet a nice boy from the University of Iowa. But that’s a story for another time. Maybe even for another blog. And then I headed east to my little town of 12 people.

I got here around 10:30 and of course the place was dead. They roll up the sidewalks and lock everyone away for the evening. Even McDonald’s and Dairy Queen were closed. I went and go the key to my place from security and then drove to my humble abode. As always it is in Iowa, it wasn’t exactly what I was expecting.

My arrangements are such. It’s an old house that has been turned into sleeping rooms. There’s one bath up and one bath down that are shared by the many guests of the house. Tonight I think I’m the only one here, but it was 10:30 when I got here so they may have been in bed already. My room consists of a bed and a dresser and a night stand with a lamp. That is all. No TV. No desk. It’s a little bare. I’ve already sent an email to the tech director at school saying that I need something to use as a desk with a chair so that I can work on my computer. Right now I’m sitting in the kitchen which is ablaze with flourescent lighting. It’s the only surface in the apartment that I can sit at. The rest of the house is such. There is a kitchen that is stocked with a couple of plates and some silver ware. There is A skillet but no pans. There is a stove but except for the skillet nothing to cook with. There is a coffee pot and a microwave and a toaster. It’s all white so with the lighting it’s BLINDING in here.

After I explored the accomodations, I was off to Wal-Mart for Diet Coke. One can not live on water alone. I got to Wal-mart and I wanted to get coffee, a coffee mug, some half and half, sweet and low, and a few things to nibble on. I had been told I would be staying in a furnished apartment so I thought I would be some place where I could cook. That’s obviously not the case. I did buy some microwavable dinners so that I don’t have to eat out everyday. As it is eating out consists of McDonald’s, Hardee’s and Dairy Queen. The KFC is too far away to get to. There’s also a smoked filled restaurant called Kelsey’s which I went to when I was here last spring, but it’s hard to eat when the entire restaurant is smoking. I had forgotten that you could actually smoke indoors in some places.

So after Wal-mart is was home to put everything away. Unpack. And then make dinner. I bought a sub sandwich at the grocery which I took a picture of today. The reason I got it was because it made me laugh. You’ll understand when I post the picture. Then I watched an episode of Law and Order: Criminal Intent can I tell you how much I hate Vincent D’Onofria. He spends the entire show with his head cocked to one side, yelling at people. He is know Christopher Meloni. Who is my boyfriend. He just doesn’t know it.

And that is the wrap up of Day 1 in the Land of Corn, better known as Iowa.

PS: It’s late and I’m too tired to proof this. If there are any typos, misspellings or other confusions please forgive me. I know not what I do.


5 thoughts on “Day 1 In The Land of Corn

  1. Kelly April 10, 2008 / 06:01

    so is the free car service set to pick me up sunday and wisk me to my hotel??? teee heee

  2. Lemuel April 10, 2008 / 07:31

    For folks who are expecting you to stay two weeks+, the accommodations are rather spartan. I am guessing the dorm rooms are better. Maybe some cute guy will invite you to keep him company. Or maybe you shouldn’t – at least until you have the lighting plot all worked out. 😉

  3. Sarah April 10, 2008 / 08:06

    When you rolled into that abandoned town I thought you were in for some “Children of the Corn” style danger. Then I remembered that was in Nebraska, a way more exciting place than Iowa.

    Fingers crossed you get a desk soon. Sarah

  4. urspo April 10, 2008 / 23:57

    dear me
    that does sound like The Land of Corn
    NYC it isn’t.
    I am glad you got there safe and sound
    pleas remember to get some rest in the next two weeks; and avoid wickedness.

  5. Donnie April 16, 2008 / 12:03

    Sounds like you’re off to a great time. I can’t get over how quickly you made it through the airport.

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