I’m losing all faith in humanity.
My friends say that’s what waiting tables will do to you.
Until this weekend, I would have disagreed with them.
But the deal was sealed tonight.
In my past three shifts I have been stiffed (not in the good way) on 1,200 dollars in sales. Yes, I typed that correctly. 1,200. Twelve hundred. One thousand, two hundred.
It breaks down as follows. I was stiffed (not in the good way) on 500 bucks in sales on Saturday night. 400 bucks on Sunday night. And 300 bucks tonight. If I added it all up, the tips I received would be about 4 dollars. The worst offender. On Saturday night I had a table with a check of 175 dollars that left me a 25 cent tip. (A couple of people suggested I tell them where to put that quarter). The rest of the checks were between 50 and 100 dollars. And I’ve given up trying to make excuses for these people. If you want to go out to eat, then you need to have the money to pay for it. If not– McDonald’s is across the street and you don’t have to tip there. Or you could try Burger King. Or Chipolte. Or any other number of fast food joints that don’t require you to pay more than the check says.
If I had actually received a tip on all those checks, I would have somewhere between 180 and 240 dollars in my pocket. And the best part of all this. It cost me 60 dollars to wait on these people since I have to tip out 4 percent of my sales at the end of the night.
I’ll stop my bitching now. I still walked with almost 15% each night because many tables left more than 20% at the end of their meals, and although it doesn’t make up for the missing money it certainly helps.
But this has nothing to do with why I’m losing my faith in humanity.
At around 7:00 tonight, I walked up to my counter to greet a couple. I said hello and asked them if they were eating or drinking or both. I was told they were just there for drinks. I said great, gave them a drink menu and told them I’d be right back. When I got back, I took their order. They looked young so I carded both of them. They were from NYC and it wast the guy’s birthday. I got their drinks and everything was fine. The guy ordered a couple of more beers while they were there. The girl ordered one more. At one point while the guy was in the bathroom the girl asked me to do a birthday shout out for her boyfriend. We agreed on a dessert that was kind of small because her boyfriend was a diabetic and I told her no problem. On my way back to get the dessert I stopped by another birthday party to get a hat for my guy to wear. I came back did the big birthday shout out (which is the worst part of my job. Ask my roommate if you don’t believe me.) We chatted for a few minutes and then I had to run get drinks for another table.
When I returned they were gone. GONE!!! The fuckers walked out on their check. Didn’t pay a dime. Didn’t leave me a tip. I ran upstairs to see if I could catch them but they were nowhere to be found. I’ve been waiting tables since I was 22 and I’ve never had a walk-out. Fuck this shit. After I did a birthday shout out and all. I was pissed beyond belief. All night long I’ve been praying that the dude’s fucking chocolate ice cream puts him into some diabetic coma and he learns his lesson.
The worst part of all of this is that when you have a walk-out you are given a choice. Pay for the tab. Or get written up. I’ve seen people actually pay the tab. I say forget that. There’s no way I’m buying some punk kids ice cream and beer. I was all prepared to take the write up. Luckily, tonights manager liked me. And told me not to worry about it. But I didn’t know this till about 12 minutes before my shift ended. I’d spent the night thinking I was going to be written up. Not that I cared tremendously. It’s just that everyone loves me at work, and I don’t want anything that’s going to tarnish that.
And that my friends is why I’m losing my faith in humanity.