Back from the dead…

So I finally have a real excuse for not posting over the last two days.  I’ve been sick as a dog.  I managed to catch some sort of stomach virus that set in on Wednesday night.  I first thought I was just tired, which is what I posted, but around midnight the explosive diarrhea started.  And continued.  And continued.  And continued.  And didn’t let up until this morning.  Even multiple doses of Immodium AD didn’t help.  All day Thursday I ran a fever of about 102 and felt like shit, no pun intended.  Yesterday the fever had let up but I still felt bad.  Luckily, when I woke up this morning I finally felt like a normal person again and the diarrhea has gone.  Trust me when I say it’s not fun getting out of bed every 90 minutes to run to the bathroom.  And I didn’t quite make it a couple of times.  But that’s all the detail you get.  So that’s why I didn’t post for the last two days.

But I’m back.  My show is going okay.  Everyday though the cast, or crew, or director, or producers do something to make me wonder if they have ever been to a play before.  On opening night the producer waited until the audience was coming in to go up on stage to look for something.  It’s generally understood that once the “house is open” no one is allowed on stage unless it’s part of the show or an emergency.  Two nights ago the guy who wrote the music brought his six and seven year old children to the show.  To say that it’s not appropriate for kids is an understatement.  There’s discussion of drug use, men in the underwear, swearing, sexual innuendo, and general plot lines that are not suitable for such young children.  On one night the director of the show had the woman doing the pre-show announcement apologize to the audience for the quality of the show because one of the actors was losing his voice.  You should NEVER, and I repeat NEVER apologize for the show before it starts.  But my favorite thing that happened so far is that last night, during curtain call the director stuck his head out from backstage and was taking flash photos of the audience during the bows.  He took about ten shots and completely ruined the standing ovation the cast was getting because people stopped applauding when the photos started.  This is the kind of thing you expect in a high school play, but definitely not something that should happen in a professional setting.  I have one more show to go and then I’m done.  Yippee!

I worked at the restaurant tonight.  It’s my first shift since being sick.  I went in early to put my name in the pick up lottery, which worked out great since only two of us showed up to pick up shifts.  Seems everyone has now paid their rent and they don’t need to work as much as they did.  Which is good for me, because I’ll be there every night trying to pick up.  Especially since I was only scheduled two shifts this week.  Who knows what that’s about.  But as long as I’m able to get shifts who cares whether I’m scheduled for them or not.

So tonight sucked.  It was the worst night I have had since I’ve been back.  I have no idea why, but no one was tipping tonight.  I made 8 bucks on my first table, who had a tab of 115.00.  Do the math it’s not even 10%.  They were foreign and so I suppose I should cut them some slack…but slack don’t pay my rent.  I also had a table of French fuckers who bitched about everything.  The prices were too expensive.  The prices for alcohol weren’t in the menu.  Why didn’t they get water without asking.  And even though they fucking asked for beef fajitas they really wanted chicken fajitas.  Hmmm.  They left six dollars on 97.00.  I hope they trip and fall off the Eiffel Tower.  And then the hosts held all of my tables for a reservation that was almost 30 minutes late.  It was all high schoolers who then tried to be prissy.  They have specific menu items they can choose and we are expected to get them in and out in about 45 minutes.  Therefore they get no special requests etc…which they didn’t seem to understand.  Trust me when I say I set them straight.  I walked with about 10% of my sales tonight.  Which you can imagine is not much fun.  The only saving grace was that I was finished relatively quickly and was home before 2:00 a.m.  Let’s hope tomorrow night is better.