The next paragraph should be read with a southern accent preferably one from Eastern Kentucky.
So I done stopp’d down to the Subway t’day to git me one of them two dollar and sixty-nine cent subway sandwiches that they have on special during the week. Today was turkey day which made me very happy cause I love me some turkey sandwich from the Subway. Yesterdy was Eyetalian meatball day and that gives me the indujestyun. So t’day I done walked thru the door to get me a sandwich and find Joe standing down to the other end of the counter chattin with Rick who was addin’ the mayonaisse to the sandwiches. Seems Joe’s done heard that they’s gonna build a Starbucks out to the interstate. They’s gonna build it right next to the highway so the traveler’s’ll stop at the town. Course Rick says it’d be much better if they done built rite next to the Subway so the kids from over to the college could use it. Joe shaked his head in agreement but then went and pointed out how that would put the other coffee place in town outta business. And that’d make his brother upset, cause seems his brother done owns the coffee shop in town. It’s about this time that Betty pipes up and says she don’t know nothin bout no Starbucks but she’s done excited about the Sonic Burger they gonna build out to the Wal-Mart. Yeap, it’s gonna be right next door and she done like them Sonic Burgers.
So I might be exagerating the accent, but this is the conversation I hear today at Subway. I’ve never seen people so excited about city expansion before. You would have thought everyone in town was getting a thousand bucks. The conversation was going on when I got there and was still going on when I left. I have to admit a neither of these places will help me much, since I’ll be long gone when they are built and they are both near the highway and I’m about 4 miles away. Without a car, that doesn’t do me much good. But of course when I come back to vacation in Iowa I’ll know where to get a cheeseburger and a cup of coffee.
Days till I’m released from prison: 30